Paul B
10K Club member
Excellence Award
Reef Tank 365
Reef Of The Month
Article Contributor
Rock Pool Reef Keepers
I was out in my boat with a younger cousin going to a seafood restaurant in the Bronx that specializes in my favorite food. Clams on the half shell. And they sell them for $6.00 a dozen which is a third what my marina charges for them.
So I get half way there and like most days, my boat is the only boat out. I really don't know why many people have boats as most of those boats never leave the marina.
Anyway off in the distance I see a Coast Guard boat. He turns on his lights and siren and comes after me. So I grab my Viet Nam Veteran hat that I keep there just for this purpose as I feel it will give me an edge on what ever I did wrong.
They pull up to me and say, "Can we board your vessel?"
I say, " You got a machine gun and I got a can of insect repellent, I think you can board my vessel". So as the first one comes aboard he asks if I have any weapons. I say, "Weapons? like cruise missles? He says, "no, like guns".
I say, " I am going out for clams but they are already dead so I don't need any guns". So I ask, whats the problem? He says "safety inspection". OK, I say I was just inspected as the sticker on my window shows. He says, we want to inspect you anyway.
This is what happens when you are the only boat out there. But they are doing their job and they were very nice guys. I think my Veteran hat had a lot to do with it. So they want to see the horn work, and count the life jackets, open the engine compartment to see the flame surpressors were on. They checked the anchor and looked for the throwable device. Read the date on the fire extinguishers. I got everything. So they thank me and start to leave. I say, wait you didn't check my flares. They said they don't have to check those. I say, but I spent a lot of money on the flares and I have like 16 of them. They don't need to see them. I took them out anyway just because I got them. They didn't care and just wished I have a good day and to enjoy the clams.
I sometimes get stopped by the police but only if I have a few beautiful young girls on the boat. The 3 times I got stopped by the police was when my Daughter and her friends were on the boat. They never just want to inspect a bald guy and there are not that many Supermodel marine police officers that I have ever noticed.
But I am glad these people are out there protecting the water.
The clams were great.
So I get half way there and like most days, my boat is the only boat out. I really don't know why many people have boats as most of those boats never leave the marina.
Anyway off in the distance I see a Coast Guard boat. He turns on his lights and siren and comes after me. So I grab my Viet Nam Veteran hat that I keep there just for this purpose as I feel it will give me an edge on what ever I did wrong.
They pull up to me and say, "Can we board your vessel?"
I say, " You got a machine gun and I got a can of insect repellent, I think you can board my vessel". So as the first one comes aboard he asks if I have any weapons. I say, "Weapons? like cruise missles? He says, "no, like guns".
I say, " I am going out for clams but they are already dead so I don't need any guns". So I ask, whats the problem? He says "safety inspection". OK, I say I was just inspected as the sticker on my window shows. He says, we want to inspect you anyway.
This is what happens when you are the only boat out there. But they are doing their job and they were very nice guys. I think my Veteran hat had a lot to do with it. So they want to see the horn work, and count the life jackets, open the engine compartment to see the flame surpressors were on. They checked the anchor and looked for the throwable device. Read the date on the fire extinguishers. I got everything. So they thank me and start to leave. I say, wait you didn't check my flares. They said they don't have to check those. I say, but I spent a lot of money on the flares and I have like 16 of them. They don't need to see them. I took them out anyway just because I got them. They didn't care and just wished I have a good day and to enjoy the clams.
I sometimes get stopped by the police but only if I have a few beautiful young girls on the boat. The 3 times I got stopped by the police was when my Daughter and her friends were on the boat. They never just want to inspect a bald guy and there are not that many Supermodel marine police officers that I have ever noticed.
But I am glad these people are out there protecting the water.
The clams were great.
