I went to a Local club meet and didn't find "it."

[KrisReef]

Last night, I went to my first club meeting at a LFS. It left me wondering if I was searching for something I couldn't find and if it doesn't exist in our hobby.

Example of what I'm looking for:
I had played fantasy football for 10+ years before I almost quit. My best friend related to my burnout and offered to share a team.

The following 10 years of playing "team" fantasy football were the best! Every week, we would chat about our hobbies. We compared notes and ideas while simply staying in touch. It also created a bit of accountability. If I failed to participate in our team discussion. I tried harder the next week to be prepared. It sparked a NEW level of enjoyment in a hobby I thought I'd burned out on.

I understand it's just an aquarium, But I can't find "that" outside the forums.

One of my favorite "segments" of marine podcasts is where the hosts and guests take a few minutes to discuss their week in reefing (Reef dork or old reef therapy)

The club meeting felt empty and unwelcoming at first. I wasn't given a greeting when I arrived. Nobody spoke to me unless I introduced myself.

When questioned, everyone I conversed with was kind and happy to talk about their aquarium. Yet it stopped there with very little interest in continued conversation.

Have I just not found "it?" Am I looking in the right spots? Reef Stock is in a few weeks. It will be my 3rd time, and I seriously doubt I'll find it there (or any trade show, to be fair)

Does anyone else feel like something is missing from the hobby?

Am I just whining about having no reef friends? (I know the answer)

(A picture so it's not just a wall of text and complaining.)

Next time you are in this situation you should tell these shy reefers that you are on a first name basis with KrisReef.

The invention of the electronic age has ushered in a new civilization and culture that is not conducive to teaching people how to interact face to face with others. People are now more lonely than ever.

If you can see the problem then it’s up to you to create a solution or just let it go.

I got a lot of negative feedback for my posts recently and I’m going to work on that one. I don’t have friends who want to see my reef but the LFS gives me credit for anemone splits and texts me when they have a customer.

I’m out

Whoops, forgot the picture

 

[Grumpytank]

I agree with Reefer Matt. I have been very disappointed in the lack of local reef club meetings. The only time I get to talk to fellow reefers is at frag meets. Even then it is getting difficult because they are so crowded.

 

[Reefer Matt]

Whoever is running the meeting really needs to set the tone of excitement, comradery, participation and inclusivity. If that person is welcoming and engaging other will start to mimic it and then it will be fun. Its hard to keep that energy up all the time and especially if you have to work to get it out of the people attending and from your support team too.

Good to see you too! Talking tanks is my favorite part! In the fb group I had, I would always make sure everyone was engaged and having a good time. I personally gave away a few hundred frags in monthly raffles. Others eventually chipped in too. And we had some amazing prizes, all for free! But eventually people didn’t want to drive to pickup their prize anymore, so it came to an end. I personally funded a website and forum for the group, but they all preferred to use fb.

After a while, I realized my efforts were moot, and people just wanted to have stuff delivered to them. I eventually left that community that I started. I even tried to make an official club for southeast Michigan (MASSM), but again, fb rules in my area. People want to stay home, and not go out just to see other Reefers. So now I just reef solo.

 

[Nonya]

There's really no substitute for seeing someone's reef tank up close, especially a successful tank. Having a meeting in an LFS seems like a sales pitch.

 

[AKReefing]

I love this idea.

Who's coming to Colorado??

I've got cold drinks and Green Chili burritos

What part of Colorado?

 

[twentyleagues]

Good to see you too! Talking tanks is my favorite part! In the fb group I had, I would always make sure everyone was engaged and having a good time. I personally gave away a few hundred frags in monthly raffles. Others eventually chipped in too. And we had some amazing prizes, all for free! But eventually people didn’t want to drive to pickup their prize anymore, so it came to an end. I personally funded a website and forum for the group, but they all preferred to use fb.

After a while, I realized my efforts were moot, and people just wanted to have stuff delivered to them. I eventually left that community that I started. I even tried to make an official club for southeast Michigan (MASSM), but again, fb rules in my area. People want to stay home, and not go out just to see other Reefers. So now I just reef solo.

Yeah we called our group F.R.A.G. Flint. Reef. (cant remember what the a was lol). Group . It was around for a bit. LFS was involved, Did a raffle every meeting which was supplied by myself, the store or the other guy that was one of the founders. Had a couple tank tours, a bbq, went out of state for a store tour. Had Seachem, Brightwell and someone else in for a couple different meetings. It was fun, a lot of work, rewarding and not all at the same time. I would not run one again.

 

[Kooma]

Last night, I went to my first club meeting at a LFS. It left me wondering if I was searching for something I couldn't find and if it doesn't exist in our hobby.

Example of what I'm looking for:
I had played fantasy football for 10+ years before I almost quit. My best friend related to my burnout and offered to share a team.

The following 10 years of playing "team" fantasy football were the best! Every week, we would chat about our hobbies. We compared notes and ideas while simply staying in touch. It also created a bit of accountability. If I failed to participate in our team discussion. I tried harder the next week to be prepared. It sparked a NEW level of enjoyment in a hobby I thought I'd burned out on.

I understand it's just an aquarium, But I can't find "that" outside the forums.

One of my favorite "segments" of marine podcasts is where the hosts and guests take a few minutes to discuss their week in reefing (Reef dork or old reef therapy)

The club meeting felt empty and unwelcoming at first. I wasn't given a greeting when I arrived. Nobody spoke to me unless I introduced myself.

When questioned, everyone I conversed with was kind and happy to talk about their aquarium. Yet it stopped there with very little interest in continued conversation.

Have I just not found "it?" Am I looking in the right spots? Reef Stock is in a few weeks. It will be my 3rd time, and I seriously doubt I'll find it there (or any trade show, to be fair)

Does anyone else feel like something is missing from the hobby?

Am I just whining about having no reef friends? (I know the answer)

(A picture so it's not just a wall of text and complaining.)

This is pretty common people interactions. Most people want to talk about themselves, and enjoy when someone asks about them. But most are also so in their own world, they fail to reciprocate or engage others.

I would give it some more tries and see if you click with anyone.

I used to venture into hobbies friends were in, at great expense usually. I would enjoy them from time to time solo, but when the friend moved or the hobby got stale, i would sell it off with few exceptions. i found I wastn really into that hobby, I was into the memories and interactions I was having with others. This forum is a bit of the same thing, but the tank for me is peace and tranquility while having something to focus on, and something to enjoy. I dont have any reefing friends, I know of few in my area with tanks (nearest LFS is 1.5 hours away) and honestly while it would be nice to have, im ok with it.

Maybe your looking for friendship and the hobby is the "common interest" topic to leverage it. We use to use School, Work, etc. to find friends, but life goes on and those things end.

Good luck, but dont give up, and dont change your interests because a friend is into something else.

 

[whybenormal]

I would love to fing such a group. I was enjoying my not quite local group, even though meetings were over an hour away usually. We sometimes did tank tours to member's homes. I got frustrated by some unethical behavior, but I'm still sort of around. I wish I had the time to start something more local to me. I love in person meetings. This year would have been my first MACNA event. I'm all about the educational stuff. I love learning more, and I love teaching. I wish our club did some education.
I've still never found "it" either.

 

[Rhetoric]

What part of Colorado?

I'm up in Northern CO. Near the new Buckys.

 

[Rhetoric]

the tank for me is peace and tranquility while having something to focus on, and something to enjoy. I dont have any reefing friends, I know of few in my area with tanks (nearest LFS is 1.5 hours away) and honestly while it would be nice to have, im ok with it.

I'm okay with it also, I just know it could be better.

Maybe your looking for friendship and the hobby is the "common interest" topic to leverage it.

Hah, No maybe I'm searching for some reef friends.

I could make another post about wanting to see more aquariums in person. I visit 300-400 homes a year for my job. In the last 7 yrs I've seen 4 or 5 marine aquariums. It's not something easy to find.

 

[twentyleagues]

I could make another post about wanting to see more aquariums in person. I visit 300-400 homes a year for my job. In the last 7 yrs I've seen 4 or 5 marine aquariums. It's not something easy to find.

Thats funny, about 8 years ago I was helping a friend go pick up a washer and dryer that he got on market place. The home we went to had a 300+ gallon reef set up. Me and the owner have been friend ever since. When I got back in to salt 2 years ago he hooked me up with most of the corals I started with.

 

[rajah]

I'm in your area. Hit me up if you want to swap corals and talk reef sometime

 

[Rhetoric]

I'm in your area. Hit me up if you want to swap corals and talk reef sometime

Awesome, are planning on doing reef stock?

 

[AKReefing]

BTW, Rhetoric, the best LFS I've been to in all of Colorado was Aquatic Art in Highlands Ranch, SSW of Denver.

 

[Rhetoric]

BTW, Rhetoric, the best LFS I've been to in all of Colorado was Aquatic Art in Highlands Ranch, SSW of Denver.

Definitely a showstopper store. I don't get down there often but always leave with something!

 

[rajah]

Awesome, are planning on doing reef stock?

I think I will head down there, but don't live making that drive from NOCO to Denver... (I-25 ugh). I saw there's another local show this weekend in Lafayette - did you see that one? Looks interesting, but not too many different vendors at that one.

I still need to check out Aquatic Art sometime...

 

[Rhetoric]

I think I will head down there, but don't live making that drive from NOCO to Denver... (I-25 ugh). I saw there's another local show this weekend in Lafayette - did you see that one? Looks interesting, but not too many different vendors at that one.

I still need to check out Aquatic arts

I know Biggs Lagoon has a booth (the bigs guys are awesome) at the coral show this weekend. I work Friday and Saturday, might be able to sneak over.

I'm planning on doing reefstock on the Sunday.

 

[PicassoClown04]

I love the reef beef podcast, theres been some interesting debates on there!

For in person community building, I would really suggest hosting a frag swap! I know some of the LFS around me host frag swaps, its a great magnet for customers to the shop and encourages people to hang around so they buy more stuff- win win!

If you can become friends with a LFS owner, they will probably let you put up flyers in the shop/post on social media to advertise the frag swap. Hopefully you find your person/people!

 

[AKReefing]

Definitely a showstopper store. I don't get down there often but always leave with something!

Whenever we fly to Denver we arrange to buy frags from them and put them in our carry-on cooler for the flight home. That's where we got our Walt Disney.

Actually, any time we go to the lower 48 we do that. We end up spending waaaaay too much, but there's only one coral store in our state, and that's 350 miles away, and it's not great.

 

[PharmrJohn]

I have been in the hobby for 30 years. Up until 10 years ago, local clubs and local reef forums were highly active. I knew so many of the locals, and there was a large presence of reefers going to each other’s homes to buy, trade, and help one another.

In the last few years I have noticed that people have backed away from these local forums and reef clubs, instead interacting on Facebook or chat apps. Sometimes it is weeks in between postings.

Just like you, I have felt this profound change, and not for the better. I miss the feeling of a local community too!

Just out of curiosity, how busy are other forums, comparitively? 3Reef was where I hung my hat before, 17 years back and it was moderate in terms of traffic. This place has heavy traffic by comparison. What have y'all noticed along these lines? And do others note a drop in terms of overall interest on the forum level?