So many reefers always looking for praise…

CMMorgan

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IMG_3901-XL.jpg

I am not on social media.
This is all to make ME happy.
Here are some organisms for you to see.
IMG_3921-L.jpg

IMG_3873-L.jpg

and it does
Make me happy.
(You get the drapes at Society6)
LOVE THE DRAPES!!! I also love that Louie and Co. have a front row seat to watch the fish.
 

jmichaelh7

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Doesn’t Everyone these days who has social media post about something to be praised?

I don’t have social media but I can imagine what it’s like 10 years later
 

G Santana

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I'm too old to care about self absorbed people.
I comment on what I like, on what someone taught me and what helps me grow as a hobbyist.
I like what I like and I give it a thumbs up. If I don't like it I move on to the next post.
I love DIY threads.
But if you're going to show me that your return plumbing matches your rug well... next thread.
No need to comment
 
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MaxTremors

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I feel like this is a common refrain for a lot of people who reach a certain age and realize the world has moved on or changed without them and instead of recognizing the pattern (these same people, when they were young, were doing whatever new thing their parents thought was going to be the end of the world) and coming to terms with change, they choose to alienate themselves and claim that the younger generations and what is popular with them, is going to be the downfall of society.

People showing off on social media is just the modern version of what people have always done, clear back to the Egyptians, the phrase ‘keeping up with the Joneses’ is from a comic from 1913. People feel compelled to put on a front, to appear wealthy, happy, and beautiful, social media didn’t start this. So no, social media isn’t ruining society, TikTok isn’t going to create a generation of vapid brainwashed kids who want a handout (wasn’t MTV supposed to do that to my generation?).
 

jfoahs04

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This might just be me but since I joined this hobby I get the impression that many people are in this hobby simply to get praised and to be put on a pedestal. I’m not talking about the ones who share their passion for the hobby, giving/taking advice, etc. I’m talking about the ones who do not care about the well being of their fish, corals, or whatever forms of life they buy just so they can be praised by others on social media. I feel like so many people just use this hobby as a way to flaunt like they have money. By having the latest and most expensive equipment, corals, fish etc. Regardless if they’ve done any research on it. They do it because it’s the newest fad…for likes and comments. I saw one guy the other day flaunting an octopus on his social media he just got mixing it with clearly non compatible organisms. It was a clear disaster in the making. I feel like people don’t care about the organism anymore as much as they do as the likes and comments they get on their social media of their picture perfect tanks. No one is original anymore…

While there's a lot of truth in here, I have a problem with painting with such broad brush strokes. "No one is original anymore" isn't a statement you can make just because there's a subset of people who make it their priority to post pics and get likes and comments. Those are are a very visible (and admittedly annoying) part of the hobby, and not a particularly new one.

While social media is relatively new, the flashy tanks have been a big part of the world of reefing/fish keeping for as long as time. I grew up with a neighbor who was "passionate about fish" even though he never touched his custom 200g tank. He had team that came over and did it for him. He wanted it to show off to guests. With social media, people like that get a platform they can use to show off to far more than just house guests.

But most reefers are exactly what you said "the ones who share their passion for the hobby, giving/taking advice, etc." It's a lot of work to do this, so you have to have passion and/or a lot of money. Some people have money and passion. Some people have passion and no money, and some people have money (or a credit line) and no passion. The latter group is the minority. Thankfully, there's enough to worry about with my own tank that I can't really muster too much energy to be all that bothered by social media reefluencers.
 

zuri

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I feel like this is a common refrain for a lot of people who reach a certain age and realize the world has moved on or changed without them and instead of recognizing the pattern (these same people, when they were young, were doing whatever new thing their parents thought was going to be the end of the world) and coming to terms with change, they choose to alienate themselves and claim that the younger generations and what is popular with them, is going to be the downfall of society.

People showing off on social media is just the modern version of what people have always done, clear back to the Egyptians, the phrase ‘keeping up with the Joneses’ is from a comic from 1913. People feel compelled to put on a front, to appear wealthy, happy, and beautiful, social media didn’t start this. So no, social media isn’t ruining society, TikTok isn’t going to create a generation of vapid brainwashed kids who want a handout (wasn’t MTV supposed to do that to my generation?).
be happy we're in the reefing hobby with how social media has exacerbated things. Just look at rock climbing, guys are dying left an right to outdue each other
 

fachatga

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I’d agree there are some annoying people showing off for the sake of it. But that’s everywhere. I don’t think here more than any other place. For me I don’t know anybody in the real world who reefs. It’s sometimes a fine line between coming off as showing off and wanting to share something you’re proud of to the few people who can really appreciate it. It can be lonely when you fail fail fail fail and have nobody to share it with when something goes right.
 

davidcalgary29

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While social media is relatively new,
There are still BBSes up and running that you can access with 8-bit home computers from the '70s and '80s, either through dial-up modem or through the internet, and I'm sure it'd be possible to start some reef talk in the off-topic areas without the hassle of looking through endless pictures of showcase tanks. Posting cave rock drawings of builds with ASCII art might be kind of limiting, though. :p

I can't wait to see the BBS disease thread, though. I suggest o for ich; . for velvet.
 

rhostam

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There are quite a few things to unpack in the OP.

It suffices to say that this is human nature and this behavior is a constant in our history; what is changing is the method and medium by which this behavior is demonstrated.

Humans and our evolved big brains use our technology to adapt and overcome challenges as well as change how we express ourselves [and our more baser instincts].
 

Just John

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I posted this in the Lounge area and got no response. I was wondering if I am wrong for this way of thinking. I apologize if this is off topic but I am not looking for anything special but a response of appreciation and knowing that I helped with a problem someone is having. How do you all feel about this? Am I looking for praise? or just getting senile in my retirement, lol ?

Forum Etiquette;
I really like helping others when they have questions. Most people here respond with a thank you or more questions which is all fine. Just recently someone had a question about a coral they have. I wasn't sure so I googled it and found a good answer within a couple minutes, it was that easy and knowing they could have done the same I did not hesitate to help. But this one individual did not acknowledge my help or the answer another person here gave. Why ask questions if you cannot give a simple thank you to the help you are given. It kind of sours me and makes me less inclined to help new reefers here. That is one of the little benefits I (we) get when helping someone is just a simple thank you. That's all I have on my mind. Thank You to all the members here that go out of their way to help others, it certainly means a lot to me. Take care and stay safe.


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I feel the same way. I actually started a thread about this exact same issue a while back when I was particularly irritated after seeing a couple of replies that took a HUGE amount of effort and the op never even acknowledged them.

 
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agame2021

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I agree with the idea that people who do it for that reason alone are wrong and probably shouldn’t. Especially if all you are going to do is build a tank that destroys itself. But doesn’t their reefing style match their personalities?
I have to say a beautiful tank filled with expensive stuff that also has a nasty habit of clashing with the other stuff causing catastrophic failure? People get into our hobby for many things, I big one I have heard is to get over some sort of crutch/habit/problem/health issues etc. however you can tell a lot about a person by their tank and what they are willing to do for it!
Starts with study and a plan builds all the way up to a beautiful and mature tank that will one day be a show stopper. The biggest reason because the tank is healthy and thriving! The problem is those people are not and they are desperate for attention because they feel as though they are drowning in loneliness. It all come down to true connection and passion. Without those two things you just another wanna be.
 

Squidward

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Idk doesn't really bother me as much as certain big name people who constantly promote super expensive equipment.
 

Spieg

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I don't really mind when joe blow posts up pictures or a video of their stuff as long as it is honest and open (likes or no likes). It's the corporate monetization for "influencers" that really bothers me the most. That's what lures the wrong kind of people into the social media world. Have to laugh at some of the people on YouTube that don't have a clue about reefing (or whatever subject) but will defend their position to the death. Or the people who are obviously sponsored by company X and bend over backwards to praise said company but totally ignore any of its shortcomings.

This is clearly not just an issue for the younger folks. Had to chuckle to my self at dinner the other night when a couple at a table near us who were in their late 60s, sat across the table from each other with their phones out. I don't think they said a word to each other though the entire meal.
 

Sleeping Giant

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Reminds me of people who video/document themselves giving food or money to people that are in need, then post it. Looking so hard for outside praises, when they could have done the same thing without the views and likes from all over the internet. Which in my mind would be why you give to people in need, because they need it and you are able to help. Not because you want people to think your such a selfless individual.
 

Cell

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Reminds me of people who video/document themselves giving food or money to people that are in need, then post it. Looking so hard for outside praises, when they could have done the same thing without the views and likes from all over the internet. Which in my mind would be why you give to people in need, because they need it and you are able to help. Not because you want people to think your such a selfless individual.

While somewhat self serving, those videos/pics can help inspire others to do the same. I daresay quite a few R2R members enjoy looking at the toy drive pics every year and seeing how happy the kids are.
 

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