Looking for Support!

[NanaReefer]

Due to a severe medical condition that has sent her to the hospital twice in the last 6 months, my sister is trying to quit smoking. Needless to say she is miserable. Needless to say so am I as we live together-lol.
I'm trying but I don't know how to help her. She says some of the most outrageous things, I'm left with my jaw hanging open. [emoji15]
I use to smoke myself. Quit back in 2002. So I kind of get it. I say kind of because I've discovered that there is a very big difference between wanting to quit and doing so by choice and not wanting to but are forced to do it.
So any words of encouragement that you all may have to offer would be much appreciated. For both of us. Well maybe not so much by her right now-lol.

Thank You Reefers [emoji5]

 

[saltyfilmfolks]

Interestingly the chemical effects of nicotine and cigarettes wear off surprisingly fast. The habitual and psychological take a lot longer.
A quality vape can help with that. Go low dose nicotine Find a flavor at a shop where the folks aren't dumb.
I'm doing it again right now.

 

[NanaReefer]

I've mentioned vaping to her several times. Nothing positive came from it. She told me if she wasn't so stressed out about my reaction she'd smoke. This makes me angry. Am I supposed to say it's ok, smoke if you want? I'm trying to say nothing but geeezzz. She has COPD and is just getting over a very bad bout of Bronchitis. Smoking killed my mother & 2 other sisters. So yeah I've got attitude and do not understand why she doesn't.

 

[Lionfish Lair]

If she's saying that, she's not ready to quit just yet. If she's not ready to quit, she won't. If she's "afraid" of your reaction, she's going to try and avoid it and find clever ways to smoke behind your back.

I don't have any helpful suggestions. I quit because they told me my spinal fusion would have a 50% chance of failing if I didn't. I was smoking behind my family's back until that time

 

[Lionfish Lair]

Actually, I do have a suggestion. Wellbutrin.

 

[alexkharden]

I started vaping and haven't had a cigarette in 2 1/2 years. I was a 2 pack a day smoker for 27 years. I was a hardcore nicotine fiend, if I can do it with vaping, anyone can.

 

[Lionfish Lair]

Do you think you'd have trouble giving up the vaping?

 

[Duke4Life]

Do you think you'd have trouble giving up the vaping?

This is what I always want to ask those that suggest this myself lol

 

[saltyfilmfolks]

The vape nicotine is easer to stop using. Your body really wants the rest of the poison in the cigarette. It's not just the nicotine. Kinda gross really.

Once I was on the vape about 2 months on low dose nicotine I stopped using it cold turkey.

Little to no drug withdrawal symptoms.
IME if your vaping you can stop pretty much right now.

Smoking is also a self nurturing habit. It gives you something to do with your hands. It actually hurts a bit on the lips you get and chest maybe producing endorphins like a tattoo. Edit. Rember the rubber band snapping around the wrist method for you quitters?
So once you've trained yourself to self nurture by smoking it's really hard to find those substitutes easily. That's IMO and research It's really the habit that's hard.
I believe that's why Wellbutrin works for some. It's blocking the receptors that like the drug and the excess pain. Or maybe vice versa feeds those receptors. I forget. that stuff made me mental years ago

 

[NanaReefer]

Dang I'm so angry!! UGH!! I feel stupid. She's been smoking all day! I don't understand it. Hours spent in the ER. 2x in the last 6 months. Oxygen levels dangerously low. Steroids, nebulizer, inhaler and antibiotics to say nothing of the cost of the ER visits.
We spent years and years watching my mother die from this exact same thing, same reason. It was horrible! Then to watch 2 other sisters die from cancer? 1 definitely smoke related the other most likely too. I can't stand the thought of doing it again. Why is she doing this?! OMG?!! [emoji24][emoji24][emoji24]

 

[drstratton]

I'm so sorry to hear this! It's very hard to watch someone that you love continue in such destructive behavior! The only thing I can say, is that I will be praying for your sister and for you!

 

[blackdogal73]

Hug her.

It won't stop her from smoking, but it will help stop the hard feelings between the two of you over it.

My destructive behavior drove me up the wall. I KNEW it was destructive and in my frustration, doubled down on everything instead of slowing down.

Anger leads to hard feelings, and that turns to regret. Neither helps, and we only makes the situation worse.

Your love for your sister is worth more to both of you.

As as silly as it sounds, hug her.

 

[saltyfilmfolks]

She's an addict and under stress. It's the easy way out.
What's goin on in her head is really complicated. Her verbal defense of smoking is just that.
Tell her you love her and hold her. It'll go farther than any words you both have.

 

[rayn]

It's a struggle. As a ex smoker you know, but you said it best. Quoting because you want is different the because you have to. I've struggled for years trying to quit. I did it for a few ml the here or there, but never for good. I started vaping a few months ago. I can't say I am completely off the cigs, but it has cut me down considerably.

Ask her why she is against vaping? There are some amazing flavors out there. If she shows interest, go to a shop and explore the possibilities they have.

 

[Chrisfish]

Actually, I do have a suggestion. Wellbutrin.

I am not a smoker but Wellbutrin helped me with other issues, you don't gain weight and imo or at least for me it's a good antidepressant and I know of smokers that used it and it really helped.

 

[NanaReefer]

I hugged her. Now she can smoke comfortably. Meanwhile I'll just sit back quietly and watch her slowly die. I've got a lot of practice that's for sure...

 

[mfinn]

I'm sorry you have to go through this. Addiction is terrible, and since smoking is mostly socially acceptable, and legal then it's tough to get her to the point where she knows she has to quit.
You have to accept the fact that there is nothing you can say that will make her quit until she wants to.
The stop smoking programs that use Wellbutrin do help many.
I used one of those drugs back when I quit.

Continue to point out those programs and ( I hate it) the other option. ( vaping).

 

[Lionfish Lair]

Nana, can she somehow get Wellbutrin written for her for depression? It's covered under insurance as an antidepressant and you just have to pay the regular co-pay. If it's written for smoking cessation, it's not covered. I really am surprised insurances don't provide more assistance than they do, as smoking has to be one of the top reasons they have to pay out so much. Yes, that's being a little dishonest, but I think the insurances are being unfair. Think of this as a possible life saver for your sister, that's worth a little victimless dishonesty. I say victimless because the money you'd be forcing them to give up front, will be a whole lot less than it could be as a result of continued smoking.

I started Wellbutrin for depression. At that time, I had no plans to quit smoking. I wanted to smoke, due to extra stress. I loved it. When I started the med, in a couple of days I put the cig up to my mouth, but I didn't want to light it. I wasn't nauseous, there was just something.... I can't explain it. So, every part of me wanted to smoke, but my body just said "Meh". I think the pack I had at the time is still in my car, and that was 2011. Like Chris said, it doesn't make you gain weight like other antidepressants and, I'm sure this isn't important right now, but it doesn't affect you sexually like a lot of the others can. I'm a nurse, so you're gonna get cander here. I was never a nurse to mince words. Some antidepressants can make that part of your life just stop, but it's a healthy part of living.

Sorry this is so hard for you. :-(