Convincing parents/spouse to get a reef tank. What worked (and didn’t) for you?

[Hugh Mann]

Well, when I set up my tank, I just went ahead and did it, because we were in my house. Let's just say that was one of the cited reasons she left, so I'd say that didn't work.

But if her only objection is cost, it's your own dang money, and there's worse things to spend it on. Maybe offer to foot the extra insurance for water damage if it's not already covered.

I'd personally recommend to shop used. If you look around for a bit, you can score sweet deals. I set up my 55 for a fraction of the cost of buying new.

 

[ImaFlippinDolphin]

Fish poop is coral food, the best in the business be it large or small if you keep corals let the fish do the doo

 

[Anubisxii]

I got a reef tank for my birthday, so hard for anyone to fight that. After a month she was hooked almost as much as I am. We already upgraded one tank, set up the old one in our bedroom and looking to upgrade again to a 100+ after our lease is up.

Slow and steady wins the race. Let her/he name the fish, KEEP IT CLEAN make sure every tool has a home and all buckets are put away so it's not an eye sore and give them time. We went coral shopping today I planned on just picking up one small piece but she demanded we get 4 and wouldn't let me pay for it. So it was a win win

 

[HB AL]

Maybe I missed something but a 10G reef tank is not gonna be that much $ initially and to maintain. Your mom sounds like she gave you a green light to me, I would go buy it tomorrow

 

[JumboShrimp]

The one sure-fire line to convince a family member to support ANY new hobby. Just say this:

“... But it will keep me off the STREETS and off of DRUGS!”

Lol. Best wishes!

 

[Tamberav]

If you spend all your money on a fish tank you won’t have any left for breaking the law and that’s a positive for a parent

 

[rubertoe93]

I wanted a fish tank,
My girlfriend didn’t want a fish tank,
So we compromised,
And I got a fish tank

 

[RocketEngineer]

I got lucky because I had a reef before we started dating. When she came over she would curl up on the couch and just watch the tank. I had to shut that system down, we got married, bought a new house, sold the old one. During all that, we talked about setting up another tank. She gets to help pick the “pretty fish” and I get to buy equipment I want.

 

[Just John]

I see you were on the site today, so I assume you got a tank. What did you get set up in the end?

 

[MNFish]

Explain that any future birthday, or other gift shopping will be much easier as there is always going to be something you want...

 

[monkeyCmonkeyDo]

Mom or wife? Im confused... two totally diffrent things.
For me. It was a gf. I asked her to leave and now my house is mine and i can do what i want... lol
D

 

[PanchoG]

I started small with FO nano. After a couple of years I felt confident to go full reef and my wife support it. After one year more, I talked to my wife at the time I received my annual bonus and went to a 130 g system. Since then I have been upgraded the system every few months. My wife argue sometimes but mostly agree once she sees the fish and corals. I try to take her often to the LFS so she has the option to select some corals and fish.

 

[reefinatl]

Hey everybody. I want to get a small 10 gallon reef tank and my mom was (and for the most part is) for it. The only thing that off puts her is the cost. She’s done her research and so have I and we’re not going to become gear junkies. However the nice pieces of coral do come at a price. All of that aside how do you (and did you) convince someone to get a reef tank?

You have no business dropping more than $30 on a coral in your first tank unless you got wads of cash burning a hole in your pocket. Really I'd bet you can stock a nice basic 10g nano off of freebie stuff from a local club, especially as a kid. Do a little GSP Island, a couple candy canes, frogspawn, and some old classic cheap but nice zoas like watermelons and dragon eyes. Would be a great tank to learn on and probably doable for $100 with a little elbow grease and donations.

Get that down then move on to harder stuff. Jumping into acros in a nano is a recipe for turning cash into coral skeletons and losing love of the hobby.

FYI, wife and mother are different things. Wives you do it and ask for forgiveness, moms you beg money from.

 

[reefinatl]

I started talking about an aquarium and the wife said she's always wanted a salt aquarium. I never would have guessed. Then she says it has to be at least 150gal ! We settled for 125 as we got a deal on a used one. She knows it will be expensive and is OK with that. I don't know if this makes me lucky or not. LOL

Lucky maybe, but man my wallet quivers at the though of having my wife be pro-buying fish stuff. Spend enough without her being on board as it is.

 

[Just John]

Lucky maybe, but man my wallet quivers at the though of having my wife be pro-buying fish stuff. Spend enough without her being on board as it is.

I have a delicate balancing act in my house. My wife says to get what I want if I enjoy it. Now I'm the only one to hold me back. I'm not very good with my part.

 

[seant2h]

The way I see it there are healthy hobbies and unhealthy hobbies. I had enough unhealthy hobbies to now see the value in healthy hobbies.

 

[mpatient]

It sounds like you have done your research and that is everything! I am going to answer your original question. As a mom to a teenager, I can tell you exactly what has worked on me.

When my daughter was eight, she wanted to learn to play the guitar. Knowing that interests are fleeting at that age, I got her a ukulele for $15. Fast forward 10 years, and she now owns 7 guitars, 2 banjos, a mandolin and yes, 5 ukuleles. Many of which she saved and purchased herself, or we found good deals on used instruments. (Except for the new Gibson hiding in my closet for her high school graduation). She is often hired as a studio musician, and plans on majoring in music production. The point of my momentary mom-brag is that once I saw she was constantly practicing, learning, and taking care of her instruments, the more comfortable I felt budgeting money to put towards something she loved doing. It does not matter if this will be her life career or not. It matters that she put in the effort, showed me her dedication, and has found something she is passionate about.

If you show your mom you are dedicated, keep your tank (and your room) clean, and continue to thoroughly research everything, the more likely she is become excited about your new hobby. Start slow!!

You are absolutely going about this the right way. My office tank is a WB 10G, and I love it as much as my 90g. For the price, and the quality of the tank, you cannot beat it. The return pump is weak and loud, so I upgraded to a SIcce 1.0 immediately. I believe the IM has a better stock pump, but I could be wrong. You will need to take that into consideration when purchasing your tank. Here are my thoughts

1. I would not waste my money (I did) on the nano-skimmer. It was more trouble than it was worth. Weekly water changes on a 10g done religiously is enough. At 3 months, all my corals are thriving including the two " easy" SPS. That being said, I would not go 1 minute without a skimmer on my 90g.

2 . With nano tanks, the biggest $ punch is going to be your light. Since you are not (and should not) start with SPS, there are many affordable lights out there that will work for your needs. You can save up and upgrade the light later or you can find a killer deal on a used one.

3. Water from the LFS over an RO/DI for 1-2g water changes per week is a great option. I did it it for 2 years. Just be sure you are getting plain RO/DI from them as well for top offs. In the meantime, look for used RO/DI units on R2R, or Craigslist. I got mine for $50, and works like a dream. This is ultimately the way to go IMO, but it is not needed in the beginning if you access to a LFS that sells water.

4. I don't have an ATO on my 10g at the moment. I have a line marked with a little piece of tape, and it when it gets below that line, I top it off with plain RO/DI water. Not ideal, but all my $ goes to my 90g and livestock. On the search for a used one or will wait for a Black Friday sale in November.

My apologies for the long post, but that is what we moms do. From your posts, I can see you are well aware of the costs. It is not a cheap hobby, but if you do it right, it does not have to break the bank. The advice on R2R is phenomenal; however, you will find opinions on a single topic are all over the place (even mine). Make decisions that work best for you, but if the majority of the people are giving the same advice on any given topic, it is probably wise to err on the side of caution. For example, when 100 people tell you not to put a tang in a 10g, but there is 1 dude who says go for it, don't put the tang in a 10g.

Good luck, eat your veggies, and clean your room! Happy reefing!

 

[John Bolden]

I waited 2 years and contuned asking until they said yes lol

 

[runcis]

I wanted a fish tank,
My girlfriend didn’t want a fish tank,
So we compromised,
And I got a fish tank

I wanted a marine tank,
my husband didn't want a marine tank,
so I went to the LFS when he was away,
and bought the whole setup,
and when he came back,
he just sat in front of the tank,
and was totally fascinated by it.

NB it was/is my money

 

[LegendaryCG]

Well 10g should be doable to setup for about 400$ or less depending on what you select. Don’t need a skimmer, probably do want an AIO, a nice piece of rock, a AI prime if you want a nice light but there are cheap basic ones that will grow coral fine. An ATO would be a really good idea to make life easier.

You don’t need to add additives with a 10g, a bucket of water is a 50% change, which means with a water change schedule you probably don’t even have to test other than salinity.