Funny Quotes

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Okeewanfonokee

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I love funny quotes, anyone have any?

Give a man fire he is warm for a day, set a man to fire and he is warm the rest of his life.

If you give someone twenty dollars and you never see them again, it was probably worth it.

Dont sweat the petty things and dont pet the sweaty things.
:biggrin:
 
Women should be obscene and not heard.

I started out with nothing and still have most of it left.

I don't believe in Astrology...I'm a Sagittarius and we're skeptical.
 
"Son if you want anything out of life you gotta work for it.Now be quiet they are announcing the lottery numbers"

The one question that humiliates most men"Will you go buy me some tampons?"
 
The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

You can go a long way with a smile. You can go a lot further with a smile and a gun.
 
Its better to keep your mouth shut and let people think you are stupid than to open it and remove all doubt.
 

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