Our 400 Gallon In Wall Natural Sun-Lit Reef

[skinz78]

Good to hear Joe!

 

[Squishie89]

Hi friends, it’s been a while, since I updated and I’m sorry for that, I haven’t been in the best of places, the holidays our anniversary and Kelly’s birthday really got me down and I felt myself spiraling into complete depression. Over the last few weeks I feel I have been renewed with happiness in my heart again, I want to live, and I know I can be happy again.
No longer will I hide in the shadows of Kelly’s death but in the bright light that was her life. I will be eternally grateful for the love we shared, and will no longer consume myself of her death but her love of life instead.

Joe

I am glad to hear you are doing better. I know how hard it can be to overcome grief. Stay strong and keep up the good work.

 

[prsnlty]

I'm sorry it's been so hard on you but happy to hear that you're moving forward. Though I don't know your wife, I'm pretty sure she wouldn't want you to live in sadness and would only want the very best for you.

God bless

Jackie

 

[jdpiii3]

I am a widower. On June 2, 2013 at 10:22pm, a date like any other date when you look at calendar, my wife of 24 years, Kelly Marie, died. To us 10:22 meant so much more, it was our - first date, engagement, marriage, vow renewal and a joyful game we would play almost everyday of our lives together. Seeing if we could get in front of a clock as it would tick 10:22 we would kiss and giggle like those giddy teenage kids from way back when, It was a great game. …life changes in an ordinary moment.

During the month leading up to Kelly’s death, I was sleeping two to four hours a night, making hospital vigils; attending a dozen hours a day. I went back and forth, home/hospital / work from the moment her symptoms of colon cancer first appeared. One night, I woke up to her 4 a.m. screams. My fear was overwhelming. I had to punch my heart to start breathing. It is an experience that is embedded forever in my memory.

Coming home to an empty house is not easy. There is no one to greet you, and the chair opposite mine at the dinner table is empty. The house seems to echo from the silence and I shed a tear as I remember that I’m now alone. So many years together, so many memories the two of us created together is all I have left. Losing a loved one changes your entire life, especially when the loved one was also your best friend. I feel completely lost and totally uncomfortable making even minor decisions. The bed feels big and I hug the pillows for comfort. But something inside me tells me that I can survive!

How does a man pick up the pieces of his life after years of marriage? For me, at first, it seemed impossible. “I simply can’t do this,” I said to myself. This is way too much-way more than anything before. I simply felt unequipped, lacking the strength and courage I thought it took. I had suicidal thoughts while looking for a non-existent exit strategy.

There definitely is something to be said about going through that first calendar year alone. There were the first holidays and the first birthdays. There was that first wedding anniversary. Seeing the balloon heart form in the sky touched my heart and soul I knew at that moment Kelly will always be with me Those first time dated experiences are unsettling landmarks.

Having gone through this memorial year, I don’t want to die young like my wife did. I want to live life to the fullest with the time I have left, enjoying my days.

Joe

 

[classklown90]

I am a widower. On June 2, 2013 at 10:22pm, a date like any other date when you look at calendar, my wife of 24 years, Kelly Marie Palermo, died. To us 10:22 meant so much more, it was our - first date, engagement, marriage, vow renewal and a joyful game we would play almost everyday of our lives together. Seeing if we could get in front of a clock as it would tick 10:22 we would kiss and giggle like those giddy teenage kids from way back when, It was a great game. …life changes in an ordinary moment.

During the month leading up to Kelly’s death, I was sleeping two to four hours a night, making hospital vigils; attending a dozen hours a day. I went back and forth, home/hospital / work from the moment her symptoms of colon cancer first appeared. One night, I woke up to her 4 a.m. screams. My fear was overwhelming. I had to punch my heart to start breathing. It is an experience that is embedded forever in my memory.

Coming home to an empty house is not easy. There is no one to greet you, and the chair opposite mine at the dinner table is empty. The house seems to echo from the silence and I shed a tear as I remember that I’m now alone. So many years together, so many memories the two of us created together is all I have left. Losing a loved one changes your entire life, especially when the loved one was also your best friend. I feel completely lost and totally uncomfortable making even minor decisions. The bed feels big and I hug the pillows for comfort. But something inside me tells me that I can survive!

How does a man pick up the pieces of his life after years of marriage? For me, at first, it seemed impossible. “I simply can’t do this,†I said to myself. This is way too much-way more than anything before. I simply felt unequipped, lacking the strength and courage I thought it took. I had suicidal thoughts while looking for a non-existent exit strategy.

There definitely is something to be said about going through that first calendar year alone. There were the first holidays and the first birthdays. There was that first wedding anniversary. Seeing the balloon heart form in the sky touched my heart and soul I knew at that moment Kelly will always be with me Those first time dated experiences are unsettling landmarks.

Having gone through this memorial year, I don’t want to die young like my wife did. I want to live life to the fullest with the time I have left, enjoying my days.

Joe

That was very touching. I am so sorry about your loss. You're a stronger man than many of us.

 

[revhtree]

Joe man that is inspiring my friend. God bless you bro.

 

[Sacohen]

Joe;

I've read your story #'s of time and feel for you every time I do.
I'm glad you are starting to recover.
Take your life, make the most of it and dedicate every minute of it to Kelly.

My mother was diagnosed with gallbladder cancer this past June.
She had the surgery, Chemo and radiation therapy and seems to be ok, but there were moments when I didn't know what I would do if she didn't make it.
She is the rock of my family and I really don't know what my father would do if he ever lost her.

I know this is nothing like losing a wife, someone that you found, fell in love with and choose to spend your life with.

Stay strong and keep living life.

Know that you have friends and family that can help you through the rough times.

 

[TJ's Reef]

Joe, thank you so very much for another memorable posting. I will one day be in your shoes and your shared thoughts and actions will make it that much easier for me when that time comes. I cannot even imagine what from your perspective how life has changed. It is very hard to type with tears in your eyes, with my hunt and peck technique so stay strong live strong and please continue to share. I will follow.

Cheers, Todd

 

[thumperss]

One thing to remember is they're never gone tell u forget them. I known the feeling I'm a survivor of a house fire where I was the only one to make it out I lost both of my little sisters and my aunt.

 

[Eienna]

*big hug*

 

[Rjramos]

Great to hear from you again Joe. And I'm glad you're recovering from such a difficult loss. Many Blessings my friend.

 

[jdpiii3]

Thank you so very much!

 

[GoReef165]

Reading through your last post I really can't imagine what you've gone through this last year but you're a strong man Joe and I'm glad you have such an awesome outlook/attitude on living life. Kelly will never be forgotten. Blessings to you.

 

[darylb94]

Joe we have never spoke before but you are truely inspiring I lost my step sister on may 24th 2012 was the hardest day of my life we lost her to an accidental over dose on panadol she left behind 3 beautiful kids and I love seeing them they have helped me with my tank seeing there faces light up when they see nemo makes your heart melt. I wish you all the best with everything that is going on and just remember to solider on brother

 

[Steelerfan747]

Glad to hear of your desire to live. Many Blessings my friend

 

[Saltgator]

God bless you Joe. Truly inspiring thread. My hat is off to you and everything you've been thru. Great looking tank, a true show stopper. Keep up the inspiring work brother!

 

[8pixel]

Having gone through this memorial year, I don’t want to die young like my wife did. I want to live life to the fullest with the time I have left, enjoying my days.

Joe

Such a great thread! As a fellow RUSH fan, did you ever read Neil Peart's book "Ghost Rider?" No idea if it is helpful at all but it was a great book about similar circumstances. Best wishes.

Ken

 

[jdpiii3]

Such a great thread! As a fellow RUSH fan, did you ever read Neil Peart's book "Ghost Rider?" No idea if it is helpful at all but it was a great book about similar circumstances. Best wishes.

Ken

Thank you Ken, Greetings to another RUSH fan! Yes I have read it when it was first published and I have read it recently. Daily playing of Clockwork Angels help also.

 

[renoeb]

Genuinely impressive

 

[Scubafrog]

Awesome looking tank and inspiring (but very sad) story. Great to see so much support from the Reef2Reef community and you have touched and tought many people with this post that you wil probably never know. Stay strong as you are an inspiration to us all.