Wedding Cakes - Reef Inspired

[AwildcatsZ]

My beautiful wife and I got married yesterday! The ocean and reefing are both special to us, so we decided to go with a Reef inspired wedding cake!

Any other reefers out there do the same?!

Also, what is your #1 tip for a healthy and happy marriage?

 

[steelwrap]

Nice looking cake.
Communication is the key. Lack of commcating will lead to resentment in the long run.

 

[dantimdad]

I wish I could get my fiance' to agree to that. :)

 

[Geebs19]

We had that same slogan on our koozies (can huggers for you not midwest folk)

 

[norfolkgarden]

Congratulations!

 

[AwildcatsZ]

Nice looking cake.
Communication is the key. Lack of commcating will lead to resentment in the long run.

Thank you! We’ve been together 4 years now and I will agree with that. 99% of arguments start by lack of communication. Luckily those are far and few between.

 

[Geebs19]

[QUOTE="

Also, what is your #1 tip for a healthy and happy marriage?[/QUOTE]

Im in my 4th year of marriage, so take my input with a grain of salt. Let the small stuff slide, remember you are 2 completely different people who tend to do some things different. You may think you are in love now, but wait until you have a child.

 

[TriggerFinger]

I have no marriage advice but beautiful cake, congratulations and good luck!!

 

[Sod Buster]

That's a great cake. I work long hours while farming and basically home to eat and sleep for 6 months out of the year. I always take the time to write a nice short note to leave on the counter before I rush off to work. Basically letting her know how special she is to me, couldn't do it w/out her, and not a minute of a 16 hour day passes w/out her in my thoughts. That always makes her melt a little and she feels like an important part of the team. Being a team is what it's all about.

 

[Sod Buster]

We had that same slogan on our koozies (can huggers for you not midwest folk)

In the northeast, we call them a slang term for mammeries. My yeti insulating device says "nice cans" in a bright orange sticker!

 

[dantimdad]

That's a great cake. I work long hours while farming and basically home to eat and sleep for 6 months out of the year. I always take the time to write a nice short note to leave on the counter before I rush off to work. Basically letting her know how special she is to me, couldn't do it w/out her, and not a minute of a 16 hour day passes w/out her in my thoughts. That always makes her melt a little and she feels like an important part of the team. Being a team is what it's all about.

After having two fail despite my best efforts (not just my words, all those around me), I learned that it takes a team. If you don't have that, it won't work. Sherry and I are definitely a great team. Can't wait to marry her. 12 days!

 

[Sod Buster]

Sherry and I are definitely a great team. Can't wait to marry her. 12 days!

Yeah man, that is around the corner! That'll be a happy day.

 

[norfolkgarden]

Lol, since you asked. ;-)

A cranky old man who was married 47 years, once told me that a long marriage is about "putting up with each other's ish."

Everyone (most everyone) is capable of appreciating the good times.
Dealing with the bad times is the difficult part.

Whatever random habits that each one of you has (lol, we all have some habit that makes our beloved insane.) it is about tolerating those.

Not very uplifting, but probably perfectly true. :-)

.

A marriage study said it is all about "accepting each others 'bids' ".
That each opportunity to talk about something (a 'bid') was met with either genuine interest or indifference.
Too much indifference leads to withdrawal and trying to find interest from someone else.

.

And on a personal level.

I am a bit of a steamroller. I can easily think I'm right. Only I'm right.
What the Heck is wrong with you?
Why did you think that was a good idea?
I asked you not to do that!

I make a conscious effort to remember my first 2 failed marriages. and realize
1. I could be wrong.
2. I could *always* be less of a ...
:-/
3. Seeing Better Half's happy smile is way better than causing sadness.
4. It wasn't that important any way. :-)

Remember these if you're the steamroller.
Flip them if you're a doormat.

If you don't know which of you is more dominant, ask a trusted friend and show them this, someone who is capable of keeping their mouth shut afterwards. ;-)

Good talk. :-)

 

[Sod Buster]

and realize
1. I could be wrong.
2. I could *always* be less of a ...
:-/
3. Seeing Better Half's happy smile is way better than causing sadness.
4. It wasn't that important any way. :)

Well said. It took me years to figure that out. Not just a marriage, but any relationship that is important. Family and friends/coworkers fall into that logic also.

 

[norfolkgarden]

That's a great cake. I work long hours while farming and basically home to eat and sleep for 6 months out of the year. I always take the time to write a nice short note to leave on the counter before I rush off to work. Basically letting her know how special she is to me, couldn't do it w/out her, and not a minute of a 16 hour day passes w/out her in my thoughts. That always makes her melt a little and she feels like an important part of the team. Being a team is what it's all about.

That's the 'squishiest' thing I've ever heard you say. :-)

My piece of ice cracked a little bit reading it. Nicely done.

.

It sounds like you are very lucky man. All the best to both of you.

 

[Sod Buster]

That's the 'squishiest' thing I've ever heard you say. :)

I know where my butter is breaded!

 

[Gonebad395]

Nice cake and congratulations on the marriage. What I find works always speak your mind even if it’s not what your wife wants to hear. If you don’t you’ll be mad at yourself for not speaking up and just leads to resentment.

 

[Sod Buster]

In addition to @Gonebad395, involved in a serious/meaningful conversation that you both have strong opposing opinions about, keep cool and be nice. A couple of phrases that work pretty well that I use when necessary; "I'm sorry you feel that way about this, as I thought I was making the best decision on circumstances faced". Or if you keep getting talked over and can't finish a statement, "I understand what you have to say, you feel is more important than anything I can say at this time, but, I was interrupted and will start my previous statement again if you'd like to listen"?. In something more heated, to quell it, "we have all these things to do, can we please argue about it when we both have the time"? As a couple, you're over it then, and all is forgiven.

 

[AwildcatsZ]

All great advice! I know I’ve only been “married” for two days, but I will say that keeping things exciting is a huge goal. We always like to do and see new things. This keeps conversation natural and usually filled with smiles and laughs.

 

[boltzfan]

Coming up on 17 years of marriage and the number 1 thing to remember is its for life. No matter what it's for life. There will be ups and downs, times your more connected, times your more attracted, times your less connected, times your less attracted. When you stick to it and fight through it you grow closer than you can ever imagine. But, you have to commit in your head you will never quit. Congrats and awesome cake! I'll show my wife she will get a kick out of it