How do you pick yourself up after a loss?

[findingsimple]

Had my first few big (for me) losses this week. Feeling deflated and frustrated.

For those who’ve been in the hobby for a while (or a little) how do you pick yourself up after a loss or run of losses?

 

[flashsmith]

Seriously though just keep going forward. This hobby has a high mortality rate unfortunately. I've gotten away from corals myself. I still have a lot of thriving stuff but if it ever withers away I'm not replacing any of it. Alot of the things we want just doesn't do well in a tank. It can survive for years though. As far as fish go they are fish and not pets like dogs/cats. It's disheartening still but generally it will just get replaced at some point.

 

[Zos4me]

Maybe just take a break. Let the tank be as it is. keep maintaining it but just get your head right and try again

 

[billyocean]

If mine goes then I know some changes/different directions I'll go. Disheartening yes...but I enjoy it too much to quit

 

[j.falk]

It happens. Life is not perfect no matter what you do. There will always be ups and downs. You just gotta take things as they come, do the best that you can with what you have available to you, learn lessons from the experiences you've been through (both the good and the bad) and keep moving forward.

 

[brandon429]

If your loss was a fish kill, instate disease preps for the tank from the stickies in the disease forum + only add prepped fish on the next go and never add anything from a pet store to your tank that you don't observe in a fallow separate holding tank

If the loss was a tank crash, you'd rip clean the tank to get the waste out then begin in the clean condition

Do opposite of what brought the losses, they're not inevitable, losses are preventable by our action and planning

No specifics were provided

 

[Nano_Man]

Find out what went wrong and learn from it . In this hobby with the type of money we invest you just need to keep going. Sometimes this hobby can be hard . But on the other hand when things are going good you can not beat this hobby. Good luck on your journey

 

[findingsimple]

No specifics were provided

Lost a few new fish and one of my first corals.

Agree it’s all learning

 

[MarineLunatic]

feeling the same mate having never lost a fish to 2 in 1 week and a half (young fish from lfs) it's just sad :( I feel you my reefing brother.

 

[InvaderJim]

Learn from your mistakes and don't beat yourself up over it. I went through probably 30 SPS frags before I figured out I had and issue and what that issue was.

 

[brandon429]

You have specific control over fish losses, it will help in motivation to apply the rules from the stickies in the disease forum, it gives hope to know there are steps you can take to change the loss % risk markedly

read ten or fifteen help threads from the fish disease forum, look how Jay troubleshoots each case, the fallback steps the tank owners take after his advice

corals are affected by your parameters but not fish, that’s disease preventable by fallow and quarantine in 9/10 cases, this detail will make your round two so much less random and more enjoyable

in fact, see this thread for next steps to be done differently

notice how you can get corals going first, it’s easier without fish, then once corals are doing well you fallow the tank and then add in only prepped fish? (Coral specific foods make fish not needed) This blends all the best practices from the disease forum:

https://www.reef2reef.com/threads/has-anyone-done-coral-inverts-only-and-no-fish-at-first.960581/
@Max93 you wrote a good thread that helps people, nice job man


preventing losses isn’t luck it’s strategy, this places the ability to succeed squarely in our hands-is much better than just thinking some get luckier than others

 

[Mr. Mojo Rising]

Its good you take it to heart, means you will do everything possible to avoid again, research is the key.

 

[fodsod]

If it's a fish then it depends on why it died (if I can figure it out) and make adjustments if needed. I've been keeping fish for over 10 years so I mostly have that sorted out. Still sad to lose one for any reason.

Corals are a whole other thing. Water parameters can be great and one day a coral is fine then it's not. No reason, just something irritated it or some other reason on a really long list of possible reasons. It can be very frustration (especially when you're a perfectionist).

I've had corals die that are considered "weeds" and can live anywhere (Mushrooms or even Xenia) yet have Acros, SPS, LPS and other softies doing great at the same time in the same tank. Makes no sense to me at times.

I do pretty much what was mentioned earlier, I walk away mentally and just physically focus on basics. Keeping everything stable and leave it all alone after I've verified stability. I stay out of the tanks, stay away from doing a ton a research to investigate the issue/issues and just let nature do its thing in the tanks until I'm in a better head space.

 

[iamacat]

Just keep at it and educate yourself on the biological processes. If something happened and you don’t know what, investigate. If you know what happened, refine your methods with what you observed.

no one has entered this hobby successfully without many failures.

 

[C4ctus99]

I sit on the floor for a couple of hours throwing a pity party then after my resolve comes back, get up and start asking questions so I don’t do it again.

The first fish I lost was pretty devastating cause I had him for 2 months. I moved the tank from where it was, and kinda restarted it. I was having a 1-1 success rate with acclimating fish for the next few months but 3 of the last 4 fish I got have made it without issue, so I think I’m learning and getting the hang of it.

Definitely times where I spent a couple days depressed because a stupid fish in my care died though :face-with-tears-of-joy:

 

[Gumbies R Us]

Sorry about the losses. I always say figure out what could have caused the setback and learn from it. Take losses as a learning experience, and you will improve the tank and love it more than you have before.

 

[JTP424]

Do exactly what you're doing :)
Keep on the forums, keep asking questions, make a plan for what you might want to do next in the hobby!
Keep involved.
We're all here to support you!

 

[exnisstech]

Loss is just part of this hobby, at least for me it has been. My worst incident was a velvet outbreak. I was going to let everything die and tear the tank down. My family shamed me into trying to save the fish that didn't die immediately. I set up a hospital tank and managed to save several nice fish that had been with me for over 6 years so it was worth it. Coral losses? I've killed so many I don't even keep track any longer. I have some nice peices but have lost a lot. I treat buying coral like playing the lottery. If I can't afford to toss the money in the trash then I can't afford to buy the coral.

 

[azreefkeeper]

I can relate as I recently moved. If you know anything about reef tanks you know they don't like change, especially rapid change. It was a struggle to keep everything alive despite all my planning. In the end I lost a single colony. Then while I was at work, the temperature probe on my heater fell out of my tank after being fixed in place for weeks. It caused an overheating situation and killed off all but two of my colonies, some snails, and my cleaner shrimp. I was devastated.

Fortunately (and I don't know how), all of the fish survived in water that was approaching 90 deg!

 

[Nano sapiens]

In nature on a healthy reef, corals die and are then overgrown by new ones...all the time And that's their natural environment.

To a large extent we can control the environment in a reef aquarium and one can have stretches where most, if not all, coral survives (for years). But given enough time it often happens that an event (equipment failure, human error, purchase of a coral with a disease, etc.) causes some die-off or even a full wipe-out.

'Expect the unexpected...and soldier on'