Tank birthday, 47+ years

Victoria M · Jun 1, 2018

Paul your wife is an angel. You are a geek...one of my favorite fish geeks though.

Paul B · Jun 3, 2018

Thank you Victoria, I think.

My wife is an angel which is why I married her. I met her when she was 12 but went out with her older cousin because I didn't want to get arrested and besides she looked 18. I am 6 years older than her which doesn't mean anything now, but when I was 17 that was a big deal. She was 18 when I married her and we are still best friends and still hang out together. WE will go out to our boat today to take it's maiden voyage in the new water which I am practically unfamiliar with. It is 60 miles east of here but by boat it would be over 100 miles to get to. I was hired once to take a boat around there but that was a long time ago.
It looks like it wants to rain so it may not even happen.

The new people who bought my house are coming over today to get a class on how to take care of this house as I have a lot of unfamiliar things here that they have no knowledge of. I have solar panels, a central vacuum system, a condensing boiler that is very cheap to heat the house. (saves me $4,000.00 a year) a water detection system that shuts off the water main in the event of a leak, DIY sprinkler system, DID alarm system etc.

I typed up 3 pages of info for them and they say they want to keep the house the way it is as we get a lot of compliments on the outside which is Japanese garden kind of.

This was her at 18. How could I not marry her.

Maacc · Jun 3, 2018

You, like all of us, lucked out that our better halves lacked discernment in their younger years

Victoria M · Jun 4, 2018

yes, it was compliment.

Paul B · Jun 5, 2018

So with our new house I wanted to get a new car. Well, another car anyway. We already have a new Jeep Compass but thats my wife's. I had a Very Manly, Chic Magnet PT Cruiser but like me it was getting a little long in the tooth so I wanted a newer car and something I can take on the beach near our new home. I went to a Jeep showroom because I saw on line they had something I liked. It was an orange and black Jeep Renegade. I wanted the "TrailBlazer" or "TrailHawk" Some kind of Trail Something package because I think it sounds very Manly. It comes with these very Manly red towing hooks on the front bumper for when it falls off a cliff and someone can come with, I guess a helicopter to pull you out. Anyway I go into the salesroom and pass this big sign that says "We Support Veterans" and this guy comes out to sell me something. I tell him I am interested in that orange one. So he tells me the price and explains it all to me and I ask, what is the price for a Veteran? He says, it's the same price. OK, so much for using the Veterans card.

We sit down to start the contract and he is writing, and writing, and writing and using a calculator to fill out the form. I said, I thought that was the price which is in huge numbers on the window. He says, "it is" but there are fees. I said, "What fees". Well there is $300.00 for dealers prep. I used to work for General Motors and I used to do the dealers prep. That meant I had to put on the license plate and take out the paper on the floor. I said OK, but $300.00 is ridiculous for dealers prep. Then he says there is a $50.00 transfer plate charge. If there is a charge to transfer the plates, what is the dealers prep fee for. Besides, they were my same plates. Now there is a $75.00 dealers fee. I asked, "what is that for?". Thats for the dealer. Of course it is! I assumed that was for the doughnuts and coffee they had there. Then of course there is tax and odds and ends which come to another $50.00 or so. And lets not forget a gas fee of $25.00

Now the car cost $500.00 more than the sticker. What is the sense of me pricing a car if you are going to add another $500.00 to the price. I was trading in my PT Cruiser and it had a full tank of gas. Were they going to reimburse me for the gas in it or my time to drive it there or go to the bank and wait in line for the money. I don't think so.

I liked the car but told him to keep it and wait for some Jiboni who doesn't know when he is getting taken.
So I went back online and saw a nice red one. I went there and it was essentially the same story. I said to keep it. If you show me a price, I won't argue with you, I may not buy the car if I think it's to much, but I like simple things. Give me the price, include any silly things you like and I will either buy it or walk out, but don't waste my time.

I tried one more time. I saw this yellow Jeep and it looked nice so I called them. A very nice young Lady answered the phone and explained the car to me so I figured I would go there to see if it was the same story.
My wife and I drive half an hour to get there and I can't find it so I go into a Lexus dealer to ask for directions. I was kind of sloppy and disheveled looking so they all gave me dirty looks as I went in. (Car salesman don't really impress me so I didn't get bothered and a Lexus is a Japanese car and I don't buy Japanese cars) ) The guy said "It's that way, and he pointed. I found the place and it looked like a huge warehouse and it had 65 fantastic looking cars all lined up with the price on each windshield.

This beautiful young girl comes over and she knew my name, birthday, what sign I was, How I liked my steak cooked and knew what car I was looking for. She showed me the car and explained all of it to me, very nice. I looked at the price on the window and I asked, "What is the Veterans Price". I figured I would ask, it can't hurt. She says I get $300.00 off. Sounds good to me so I asked, what do all the extra's and other nonsense come to. She said "Nothing, thats it". I asked, what about dealers prep, dealer fee, plate transfer charge, gas, doughnut charge, global warming fee, Prizapro charge, charge to charge charge, etc. She said, we have none of that.

Like really!. This keeps getting better. Then I ask, how much are you going to give me for that Chick Magnet PT Cruiser with 65,000 miles on it?
They gave me $1,500.00 which it wasn't worth.
I go to a bank to get a check and the teller looks at my account and calls over the manager who wants to take me to his desk to explain all the things I could do with my money. Buy CDs and all that. I told him I have all of Linda Ronstadt's CDs so I am good. I just sold my house and didn't pay for the new one yet so it looks like I am a bazillionaire, but it is only for a week until I use that money.

I bring the check to the dealer, she shows me the features in the car. Takes off my old license plates and Washes them, Then puts them on the new car.
She takes my picture in front of the car, offers me a cookie and says she is going to send me a gift.
I bought a lot of cars but this was the nicest experience I ever had buying a car. I was tempted to buy another one just because it was so nice and easy.

Brew12 · Jun 5, 2018

Paul B said:
So with our new house I wanted to get a new car. Well, another car anyway. We already have a new Jeep Compass but thats my wife's. I had a Very Manly, Chic Magnet PT Cruiser but like me it was getting a little long in the tooth so I wanted a newer car and something I can take on the beach near our new home. I went to a Jeep showroom because I saw on line they had something I liked. It was an orange and black Jeep Renegade. I wanted the "TrailBlazer" or "TrailHawk" Some kind of Trail Something package because I think it sounds very Manly. It comes with these very Manly red towing hooks on the front bumper for when it falls off a cliff and someone can come with, I guess a helicopter to pull you out. Anyway I go into the salesroom and pass this big sign that says "We Support Veterans" and this guy comes out to sell me something. I tell him I am interested in that orange one. So he tells me the price and explains it all to me and I ask, what is the price for a Veteran? He says, it's the same price. OK, so much for using the Veterans card.

We sit down to start the contract and he is writing, and writing, and writing and using a calculator to fill out the form. I said, I thought that was the price which is in huge numbers on the window. He says, "it is" but there are fees. I said, "What fees". Well there is $300.00 for dealers prep. I used to work for General Motors and I used to do the dealers prep. That meant I had to put on the license plate and take out the paper on the floor. I said OK, but $300.00 is ridiculous for dealers prep. Then he says there is a $50.00 transfer plate charge. If there is a charge to transfer the plates, what is the dealers prep fee for. Besides, they were my same plates. Now there is a $75.00 dealers fee. I asked, "what is that for?". Thats for the dealer. Of course it is! I assumed that was for the doughnuts and coffee they had there. Then of course there is tax and odds and ends which come to another $50.00 or so. And lets not forget a gas fee of $25.00

Now the car cost $500.00 more than the sticker. What is the sense of me pricing a car if you are going to add another $500.00 to the price. I was trading in my PT Cruiser and it had a full tank of gas. Were they going to reimburse me for the gas in it or my time to drive it there or go to the bank and wait in line for the money. I don't think so.

I liked the car but told him to keep it and wait for some Jiboni who doesn't know when he is getting taken.
So I went back online and saw a nice red one. I went there and it was essentially the same story. I said to keep it. If you show me a price, I won't argue with you, I may not buy the car if I think it's to much, but I like simple things. Give me the price, include any silly things you like and I will either buy it or walk out, but don't waste my time.

I tried one more time. I saw this yellow Jeep and it looked nice so I called them. A very nice young Lady answered the phone and explained the car to me so I figured I would go there to see if it was the same story.
My wife and I drive half an hour to get there and I can't find it so I go into a Lexus dealer to ask for directions. I was kind of sloppy and disheveled looking so they all gave me dirty looks as I went in. (Car salesman don't really impress me so I didn't get bothered and a Lexus is a Japanese car and I don't buy Japanese cars) ) The guy said "It's that way, and he pointed. I found the place and it looked like a huge warehouse and it had 65 fantastic looking cars all lined up with the price on each windshield.

This beautiful young girl comes over and she knew my name, birthday, what sign I was, How I liked my steak cooked and knew what car I was looking for. She showed me the car and explained all of it to me, very nice. I looked at the price on the window and I asked, "What is the Veterans Price". I figured I would ask, it can't hurt. She says I get $300.00 off. Sounds good to me so I asked, what do all the extra's and other nonsense come to. She said "Nothing, thats it". I asked, what about dealers prep, dealer fee, plate transfer charge, gas, doughnut charge, global warming fee, Prizapro charge, charge to charge charge, etc. She said, we have none of that.

Like really!. This keeps getting better. Then I ask, how much are you going to give me for that Chick Magnet PT Cruiser with 65,000 miles on it?
They gave me $1,500.00 which it wasn't worth.
I go to a bank to get a check and the teller looks at my account and calls over the manager who wants to take me to his desk to explain all the things I could do with my money. Buy CDs and all that. I told him I have all of Linda Ronstadt's CDs so I am good. I just sold my house and didn't pay for the new one yet so it looks like I am a bazillionaire, but it is only for a week until I use that money.

I bring the check to the dealer, she shows me the features in the car. Takes off my old license plates and Washes them, Then puts them on the new car.
She takes my picture in front of the car, offers me a cookie and says she is going to send me a gift.
I bought a lot of cars but this was the nicest experience I ever had buying a car. I was tempted to buy another one just because it was so nice and easy.

Ugh... Paul... I would never have figured you for one to buy a Fiat.

Paul B · Jun 5, 2018

A FIAT! Sorry, I am not hungry.

Now we have a red car and a yellow car, maybe I will get a blue one next. As I was driving this Jeep home 16 canaries landed on my hood and I didn't even see them

GBRsouth · Jun 5, 2018

So that's a "manly" bow on the bonnet is it Paul?

Dash · Jun 6, 2018

Love your new car

A few years back we had a Jeep Wrangler. It was awesome & so much fun to drive. It was stolen twice, and the second time it disappeared for good. We still miss it.
Kinda looked like this:

Now the Jeeps are so slick. Back then they were the real deal - broke a fingernail or two every time you put the soft top on. Jeep drivers have gone soft!

Genomecop · Jun 6, 2018

@Paul B are you going to share the amazing dealers name?

Paul B · Jun 6, 2018

Genomecop, it's called Novak Motors. I think they just sell cars just back from lease like one, two years or 3 years old but in brand new shape with new tires and I think they must paint ones with a scratch because I didn't see one ding or mark on anything. Fantastic place.

That bow was put on by the girl to impress my wife. Then they took it off and covered the hood in cro bars for me. I don't need a car to be Manly but you have to be a Real Man to drive a PT Cruiser and get away with it. I have had Jeeps since they were "real Jeeps" not the sissy cars they are today. When you couldn't dent them with a hammer and you could drive them completely underwater. The axels were straight, none of that soft suspension which is made for Girly men and Sissies. My Jeep had cinder blocks for springs so your teeth would shake loose on rough roads and you could drive through a brick wall while drinking a cup of really strong coffee.

This was a Jeep. It was built totally in America and was a military model which could go anywhere.

The Jeeps you see today with all the fancy lights, huge tires, weird grills and all that are for show. They are really just Girly Dodge Darts with new clothes.

Under the hood all cars are almost the same. The Jeep engine is nothing special, but it used to be totally different from regular cars. I took that Willy's engine apart to replace the pistons because it was a working truck and didn't try to impress anyone. The connecting rods were about a foot long which gives it torque. A car like a Corvette or Ford have connecting rods half the size because they are not made for power, but speed and gas mileage. It's the piston travel that gives the engine torque or power. The Willy's had what is called an "F" head engine. The valves were so big they didn't fit in the cylinder head so there was one valve in the head and one in the block.
Almost All cars today have a timing chain or belt to open and close the valves at the right time. The Willy's had a cast iron gear that weighed about 4lbs. And it had a pipe over it to pour oil on to it constantly. It will never wear or break.
The ignition system, wires and cap were encased in plumbing pipe and the distributer cap was steel and was waterproof. You could attach a snorkel and drive it under about 5' of water. Try that with your Camry.

The front axel was straight for strength, no rubber boots to break. The 4 wheel mechanism was encased in a 10" round steel ball impervious to dirt, water and mud and it would never wear out. The clutch was twice the size it needed to be so the thing could climb walls.

I like machinery and was in awe at how they built that beast. But you certainly were not going to impress any girls with it. They were real happy though when I pulled their cars out of the snow or mud sideways.

Retro Reefer · Jun 6, 2018

Your going to love all the bugs that think your Jeep is a giant flower

.. We have a lot in common with vehicles.. I learned to drive in a old farm use Willy’s, my first car was a 62 international scout with half cab like your Jeep (it would climb a tree) and for the last 13 years I have been driving a bright yellow H3... in the summer it will be literally covered with bugs.. lol, never seen anything like it with any vehicle I have ever owned guess there looking for nectar ;Wideyed

Paul B · Jun 6, 2018

Oh great, and I am moving to farm and winery country. Bug paradise.

Paul B · Jun 6, 2018

Getting ready. I removed my skimmer, Ozone, algae scrubber, 5' trough, UG filter pumps and one light. The tank is running on 2 powerheads and thats about it. What a mess.

Brew12 · Jun 6, 2018

Paul B said:
Getting ready. I removed my skimmer, Ozone, algae scrubber, 5' trough, UG filter pumps and one light. The tank is running on 2 powerheads and thats about it. What a mess.

Did I miss your move in date? I think I saw somewhere you hoped to close in a week?

mrpizzaface · Jun 6, 2018

I am sure I missed it earlier, but are you moving to the north fork?

norfolkgarden · Jun 6, 2018

mrpizzaface said:
I am sure I missed it earlier, but are you moving to the north fork?

South Fork. Near Dallas.
With Charlene Tilton.

mrpizzaface · Jun 6, 2018

norfolkgarden said:
South Fork. Near Dallas.
With Charlene Tilton.

Does that make you J.R. Or Bobby?

Paul B · Jun 6, 2018

I just found out we are closing in 2 days, this Friday. I can then rent a truck and start setting up the tank and building important stuff before the movers bring the big stuff. I am moving to the North Fork, no where near Dallas or Charlene Tilton. Closer to Christie Brinkley.

Maacc · Jun 6, 2018

Paul B said:
I just found out we are closing in 2 days, this Friday. I can then rent a truck and start setting up the tank and building important stuff before the movers bring the big stuff. I am moving to the North Fork, no where near Dallas or Charlene Tilton. Closer to Christie Brinkley.

Does Christie help move reef tanks?