Last night I went to take a shower and I see that my wife put a large bottle of "Bath Soap" in my shower. But it wasn't really soap, It was "Stress Relief Lavender Body Wash".
I immediately told her that Real Men first of all don't get stress and if they did, Lavender, "make believe" soap is not going to cure it.
Real Men want to smell clean, maybe with a hint of Cro Bar grease.
I read the ingredients, of which there were many, more than the flake and pellet foods many hobbyists feed to their fish, but nowhere could I find the word "soap". Men use soap, not lavender, lemon grass, petunia or any other girly scent. Real soap is made from dead animals like horses, cows and duck billed platypuses.
I took that lavender, stress soap and put it in my garage to wash my car with and got a real bar of soap like men used since they were making hamburgers out of Wolly Mammoths. Now my car smells like a funeral procession.
This morning, after my Cold, dark, beach walk I got home to make breakfast for my wife. On the TV there was this guy supposedly worried that his skin wasn't as smooth and clear as Taylor Swift. Men's skin is supposed to be ruddy, rough with a little, or a lot of hair and maybe a few scars from fights.
I don't know where the real Men went. I miss "The Greatest Generation". My Fathers time when Men didn't get stressed or worry if they have chest hair or if their fish got a spot.