The Miracle Tank

[najer]

Red. ;)

 

[najer]

"Do you think if we hang around the nori rock long enough looking faint that he will re fill it?" ;)

 

[vetteguy53081]

The same boiling water that softens the potato hardens the egg. It’s about what you’re made of, not the circumstances.” Is

 

[vetteguy53081]

A woman called the Colorado State Division of Wildlife regarding a snake in her backyard. “Can you tell me what kind it is?” she asked. “Can you describe it?” the ranger asked. “Yes,” she said. “It’s long and thin. Oh, and it doesn’t have any arms or legs.”

 

[vetteguy53081]

 

[vetteguy53081]

 

[vetteguy53081]

 

[vetteguy53081]

 

[vetteguy53081]

 

[vetteguy53081]

 

[vetteguy53081]

 

[vetteguy53081]

If you think you can do a thing or think you can’t do a thing, you’re right.

 

[vetteguy53081]

What do you call a fake noodle?
An impasta!

 

[vetteguy53081]

 

[vetteguy53081]

A whale swims all day, only consumes fish and water, and is fat. A rabbit only eats vegetables, runs and hops all day long, and only lives 5 years. Meanwhile, a tortoise doesn’t run and does nothing energetic, yet it lives for 100 years. And you tell me to eat well and exercise! I don’t think so!

 

[vetteguy53081]

What did the judge say to the dentist? “
Pull my tooth, the whole tooth and nothing but the tooth.”

 

[vetteguy53081]

Lawyer: I have some good news and some bad news.
Client: Well, give me the bad news first.
Lawyer: The bad news is that the DNA tests showed that it was your blood at the murder scene.
Client: Oh, no! That’s terrible! What’s the good news?
Lawyer: Your cholesterol is down to 150.

 

[vetteguy53081]

On a rural road, a state trooper pulled a farmer over and said, “Sir, did you know that your wife fell out of your truck several miles back?” “Thank God!” said the farmer. “I thought I had gone deaf.”

 

[vetteguy53081]

 

[vetteguy53081]