Thoughts on The R2R Family?

[hqn77]

See you are a relatively new member - but you sound very wise beyond your years!

Excellent post!!!

Thank you. Just been reading a lot over the years. First attempt at reefing crashed and burned after 8 months. Found R2R and was able to pick myself up and try again. Best decision ever!

 

[PeterC99]

Thank you. Just been reading a lot over the years. First attempt at reefing crashed and burned after 8 months. Found R2R and was able to pick myself up and try again. Best decision ever!

May your kindness and wisdom be repaid - wishing you much success in your reefing endeavors!

 

[PeterC99]

If I am being honest, you are right. This place is like a family. But not the kind that you have in one household. Or the kind where you get together on birthdays and holidays. For me, this place is more like the bigger family that you gather with on the once a decade family reunions. You know, the kind where you see relatives who you only met in the last family reunion and you don't remember their names.

This place is huge. People get lost here. Huge crowds and all. And unlike the small intimate family where when you have disagreements, you have to work them out (or lose an incredibly important family relationship), this large family probably doesn't miss some of us when we don't show our faces for a good long while. And probably most don't care.

True but when you do need that family support for motivation, sympathy or piece of advice, this site doesn't care where you have been, it's ready to help! Pretty amazing!

 

[sp1187]

"R2R members as one big crazy, slightly dysfunctional, maybe nutty group but it’s probably one of the most caring and inclusive families I have ever seen and proud to be part of!"

i could not have said it better myself.....;Happy

we resemble that statement.

 

[ReefWithCare]

This topic hits close to home, I run my tank like a giant family. For better or worse, everyone is in the tank together. I did have a beautiful wrasse once, but had to get rid of it when it transitioned from female to male. Couldn't risk having such an un-family friendly fish remain in my tank, that would ruin the whole community aesthetic I was desperately trying to maintain through years of growth and praise by everyone that looked at it.

I had a similar story too. My clownfish transitioned from male to female and it became totally un-family friendly in my reef tank. She was a terror trying to input her agenda all over the territory she claimed. It was heartbreaking to remove her. I still loved her, but she was ruining my community atmosphere, stressing me out, and look I was going for in my family aquarium.

My wife, who funds my endeavors was concerned how my guests would react with this valuable member of my tank removed. I told her not to worry about it as I had it covered and could just make a good reason for its disappearance like "I have no idea what got into her --- yeah she was crazy" or "ya she jumped out of my tank - sad".

 

[adobo]

I had a similar story too. My clownfish transitioned from male to female and it became totally un-family friendly in my reef tank. She was a terror trying to input her agenda all over the territory she claimed. It was heartbreaking to remove her. I still loved her, but she was ruining my community atmosphere, stressing me out, and look I was going for in my family aquarium.

My wife, who funds my endeavors was concerned how my guests would react with this valuable member of my tank removed. I told her not to worry about it as I had it covered and could just make a good reason for its disappearance like "I have no idea what got into her --- yeah she was crazy" or "ya she jumped out of my tank - sad".

I have a brother (the youngest) who had a somewhat troubled childhood. Nothing too traumatic but there were some issues. As he grew into his teenage years, he started hanging around the wrong crowd. Stayed out late, was into drinking and was smoking. He had his first kid at a young age. His wife (then girlfriend) was even younger.

I don't ever remember my parents ever telling my brother that his concerns were not family friendly. Whatever those concerns were. In fact, my parents prioritized my brother's needs because they could see that he had his own inner struggles. For some reason, his life was not as easy for him as it was for me and his other brothers.

We are all older now, we all have our own kids. And as we gather together, gratefully after a year of isolation, there is an unsaid truth amongst us. For all the troubles and headaches that we endured in our youths, we are all grateful that my parents did not shun my brother. That they treated his issues with love and understanding. Because a family that shuns one of its own because they do not see eye to eye, is no family at all.

 

[PeterC99]

I have a brother (the youngest) who had a somewhat troubled childhood. Nothing too traumatic but there were some issues. As he grew into his teenage years, he started hanging around the wrong crowd. Stayed out late, was into drinking and was smoking. He had his first kid at a young age. His wife (then girlfriend) was even younger.

I don't ever remember my parents ever telling my brother that his concerns were not family friendly. Whatever those concerns were. In fact, my parents prioritized my brother's needs because they could see that he had his own inner struggles. For some reason, his life was not as easy for him as it was for me and his other brothers.

We are all older now, we all have our own kids. And as we gather together, gratefully after a year of isolation, there is an unsaid truth amongst us. For all the troubles and headaches that we endured in our youths, we are all grateful that my parents did not shun my brother. That they treated his issues with love and understanding. Because a family that shuns one of its own because they do not see eye to eye, is no family at all.

Thank you for sharing this!

 

[bherbold8]

Very informative and less critical (for the most part )than other groups. Waterbox Facebook group is brutal, but mostly because it's primarily new reefers

 

[PeterC99]

Very informative and less critical (for the most part )than other groups. Waterbox Facebook group is brutal, but mostly because it's primarily new reefers

Interesting insight! I'm not on Facebook but now curious about the differences.

 

[fishguy242]

NICE GRAB...MODS...

 

[PeterC99]

Seems like I've touched a nerve here! No family is perfect but I reiterate my opening statement:

"R2R members as one big crazy, slightly dysfunctional, maybe nutty group but it’s probably one of the most caring and inclusive families I have ever seen and proud to be part of!"

 

[jgirardnrg]

And just like real family they make me spend obscene amounts of money. I blame @revhtree and he'd better add me to his Christmas list this year!

If you're into his hobby how could you NOT love this place. So much knowledge at your fingertips, and if you can find it, just ask. I love that I can find everything I need to know here and help those seeking help.

 

[sfin52]

I’m sure many non-Reefers see R2R members as one big crazy, slightly dysfunctional, maybe nutty group but it’s probably one of the most caring and inclusive families I have ever seen and proud to be part of!

@Erin O husband calls us the kool-aid drinkers. The truth is that we help each other, enable, cry, and go through some of the hardest parts of life. We all have different backgrounds religion, skin color, political views whats a binding is we all share the love of the reefs.

 

[Jeffcb]

Seems like I've touched a nerve here! No family is perfect but I reiterate my opening statement:

"R2R members as one big crazy, slightly dysfunctional, maybe nutty group but it’s probably one of the most caring and inclusive families I have ever seen and proud to be part of!"

Yep.

 

[PeterC99]

Like to thank everyone today for their great responses!

 

[Eagle_Steve]

Like to thank everyone today for their great responses!

And would like to thank you for creating this, so we could!!!!!!

 

[PeterC99]

Curious - Does this R2R Family ever have gatherings? Would like to meet in-person many members!

 

[fishguy242]

Curious - Does this R2R Family ever have gatherings? Would like to meet in-person many members!

yes reefapaloza was a general,but also have met many in person..

 

[PeterC99]

Notice that most Reefers have great patience!

Thank you for taking the time to throughly answer our never ending questions. Even when they have been asked before!

 

[fishguy242]

3 friends "members" 4 states,3 days...