How far would you let a "friend" go?

[wicked demon]

My friend/roommate, does not work, sits at window whining about no snow (shoveling work), then it snows, and hes excited to get work, they call, and he wont get out of bed!! He says *F* work, *F* everybody. He is behind on rent and I already let him burn me once before on a couple months rent. How far do I let "friendship" screw me? I just sold off alot of my coral to pay rent when he owes me hundreds and he wont get out of bed when work is calling? I find it hard to put sombody on the street but at what cost? What do I do?:neutral:

 

[subielover]

If it were me, he would get the boot.

 

[Blackhawk Fan]

If it were me, he would get the boot.

Agree with this.

 

[revhtree Verified Admin]

I would first sit down and have a serious discussion with him.

 

[subielover]

I would first sit down and have a serious discussion with him.

Good point Rev, I assumed this had already been done.

 

[BlazinNano]

You can only let things go so far. I mean a couple of days late or a week but you know he will get it for you is a different thing. If there are no signs of him getting his butt in gear and giving you the money back then you have to put your foot down. It is actually better to do it before it gets soo bad that you will have no chance of ever being friends again. Just tell him to be an adult and man up, get your money or he has to go. It sucks but it is life.

 

[revhtree Verified Admin]

Well it probably has already been done, but I said that just in case! LOL!

 

[wicked demon]

I see everybody here is in agreement, lol, and I already knew it, just sucks to try and help somebody out and be a really good friend, to only find out that they would never have done the same for you?? Not that the money is really even that important, just the thought that if I am struggling maybe I wouldn't be alone (thats what friends are for right?).... but I guess video games and poker are more important. Hes gotta go, I am sick of cleaning up after him anyway.:choler:

 

[revhtree Verified Admin]

A real friend would make someone be responsible for their life for their own good. Your on the right track!

 

[Stray32]

Perhaps the threat of throwing him out or giving him an ultimatum of say... one week to work and pay you what he owes you... will light a fire under his rear.

 

[aquafrags]

gotta go, and deffinitely if I am taking my LE'S out of my tank to pay rent, thats TOO MUCH

 

[RBursek]

I agree with all said here, also sounds like he maybe depressed, and that is why he cann't get going. Get going may help him get out of his funk.

 

[fenderguy1]

I would let him go as far as the change in his pocket will allow...:)

 

[ficklefins]

I was in a similar situation with roommates being late on rent and I was out a lot of money. Make sure that before you kick them out that you draft up some type of document detailing the amount of money that they owe you and have them sign it. If you ever want your money you will need some type of notice detailing the amount you are do. I would also search a few legal sites on the proper way to write up an agreement.

In the end the non-payer took out a loan and cut me a check to cover all the expenses.

 

[beaslbob]

My friend/roommate, does not work, sits at window whining about no snow (shoveling work), then it snows, and hes excited to get work, they call, and he wont get out of bed!! He says *F* work, *F* everybody. He is behind on rent and I already let him burn me once before on a couple months rent. How far do I let "friendship" screw me? I just sold off alot of my coral to pay rent when he owes me hundreds and he wont get out of bed when work is calling? I find it hard to put sombody on the street but at what cost? What do I do?:neutral:

IMHO you don't have a friend but a dependant

 

[shapermike]

it happened to me once and i was taken for 5 grand and I did not want to carry my friend any more so I sold my place and kicked hime out and moved to the beach. I lived in Ca to begin with. it is not fun to carry some one that is not even family that just sits on his rear end and takes advantage of others. this is your money. Now if you like giving money away I will takes some....:) JK

It is a Hard choice to make but it is your life and your choice to make. good luck if you wore close I would give you a free red Monti cap....;)

 

[reefdan]

his failure to meet his responsibilities to you shows that he doesn't respect you. i've been depressed before too but i never let it get in the way of my responsibilities to others.

sit him down, tell him that he's blowing it. if he doesn't do a quick 180, give him the boot.

 

[gooch Verified Sponsor]

I had a room mate that was a dead beat. Hadn't paid me rent for like six months. I let it go because he was trying to find work and he did have emotional problems. One day I came home from work and he was holding a hand gun he had just traded something to get. There he was sitting next to my aquarium with a loaded gun. He was waiving it around and I really thought that I was gonna watch him blow his brains out. I started freaking. Went out to my garage and called a friend and told him to come and get me now. I took off and fully expected to come home to a dead man and pool of blood. He wasn't there. I for the first time went into his room and found the gun and took the clip and his bullets. A week later I decided he had to go. I knocked on his door and went into a bare room. He took all his stuff. I was out like $1500 but I was just doing a happy dance like you wouldn't believe. A couple days later there was a note on the door telling me he moved out and would pay me everything he owed me. I have never seen him again. That was 11+ years ago.

It's OK to be a nice guy. But I would tell him the time not to be nice is just around the corner. Get it together or get out.

 

[nayrgaijin]

I know you have a-lot of support already to not let him stay, but it sounds like you need to be the friend here. Might upset him, but sounds like he has been piggy backing too long.
Either way, good luck man!