Literally, well, at least from me anyway. Taking into account the explosive growth of this community, I wouldn't characterize any part of R2R as having "gotten worse".. just having the same growing pains I see in every corporation under expansion (and I've worked with a lot).
At the expense of wading into the fray, I can say that since I started lurking here ~18 months ago, I've seen a fair share of great content, some bad advice, well-measured responses to emotional topics and some hot takes that I'm sure (or at least hope) the responders wish they had a redo button on. To me, it's all good... but I have extraordinarily thick skin, prefer blunt honestly to a passive voice, and possess the wisdom to know when a thread is descending into the abyss so I can ignore it, even before mods have locked it... the same advice I give to my children (to walk away and ignore it before an adult has to get involved).
I've absolutely loved seeing the differences of opinion and polar opposites in philosophy succeeding to produce gorgeous results. Proof that no one method is an absolute blueprint for success, and even those who are "punctuation challenged" have some great points that make a ton of sense when taken in context. I can't say I've seen any "clique-y-ness" other than between locals looking to grab a beer and swap frags or a few people that share the same philosophy divergent from the 'norm' (and they are usually open to constructive criticism or at the very least, will engage in a thoughtful discourse about "why"). I take what evidence I can from these healthy exchanges and try and capture some of that lightning in a bottle (or tank) to apply to my situation; no need to start a flamewar over a disagreement. I choose not to meddle in the affairs of wizards, yet still feel that when I have something useful and experiential to contribute, I have a voice.
As far as "tone" of a thread, there is no such thing as "tone" in a forum post. You are judged solely by what's in black or white. Since something like 70% of our communication skills are based in non-verbal cues, we need to do the best we can with that remaining 30%. I too have been accused of being sometimes a little too curt, snarky, or just plain insensitive... I chalk it up to being waaay too crusty and spending too much time in the Army culture. But I learned to do better. So I posit this piece of advice:
- If you're under 30, understand not everyone's lives revolves around short messages on their phones. There may be a delay, which is fine, especially when coming up with a well-thought-out response. Context matters, as does making a well-formed thought, theory or point. This is a public forum, not twitter. There's no 140-character limit, and R2R has a pretty good search function. If you can't find a thread addressing this before, and asking for help, please put as much relevant info as you can into your posts so we can avoid back-and-forth one-liners ad infinitum.
- If you're in your 30s-50s, sarcasm doesn't translate -at all- unless you insert the correct emoji ;). There are lots of forum members that lack sarcasm detectors and think you're just being a jerk, rather that practicing the highest form of wit. A 'lol' at the end of something super inflammatory and mean doesn't change what was written and make it better, it just looks like gloating.
- If you're 60+, well, bless you. Chances are you've been there, done that, and don't need to take any advice from these whipper snappers :D. Things have changed, though, both in the hobby and how we all communicate. Please don't shoot the messenger, we're all just trying to help... even if it doesn't seem like it.
- This is an international community. I've had the fortune of spending time in a lot of different cultures, but not everyone has. Americans are just... different. People in other cultures don't express themselves the same, sometimes coming off as rude or unintelligent, when nothing could be further from the truth. They may be using Google Translate to get what you're saying, and it's historically bad at understanding idioms (go ahead, try it). Everyone deserves the benefit of the doubt, so when in doubt, ask for clarification in plain language.
And as for the R2R staff, I have had nothing but positive experiences. Thank you all (and you all need your own @Team Reef tag). For all the site troubles and mod requests, you have been admirably weathering a growing storm and the vast majority appreciate your (unpaid) work. I have faith in
@revhtree, both in addressing the concerns in this thread as well as keeping this the premiere destination on the Interwebs for reefers of all shapes and sizes- enough faith, in fact, to put my money where my big mouth is with a 2-year subscription. Anyone else with me?
Oh and
@MnFish1 ... I know of a different vendor feedback method that might work well, where feedback is posted blind to the community and the vendor can respond privately to clear up any concerns before it goes public or choose to publish it as-is, but metrics on the vendor's profile show positive vs. negative vs. neutral feedback and controlled by R2R, regardless of whether the vendor publishes it or not. Whaddya think? Does that cover the bases without allowing abuse and piling on?
