How involved is your spouse/significant other with your hobby?

[Ravens243]

My girl basically ignores my tank. She will try to listen when I ramble but you can tell she doesn't really care. Sucks because if she were to get involved and actually like it, it would take our relationship to a whole another level.

 

[VP616]

If, by "involved," you mean gives me the death stare when a new box comes in the mail, does that heavy sigh whenever she sees me working on the tank, and/or wants me to sell any and everything that has to do with it tank at every possible opportunity...then yes, my wife is very "involved."

 

[TetoCCB]

My wife like that it keeps me at home. When my kids were younger, she liked that we all could have a lesson, activity or go to the store together. She knows that there are worse hobbies that take more time, cost more money and take me away more often.

After saying all of that, I doubt that she has even looked in one of my tanks in a few years.

They usually look when you’re not looking... As a kid, I’d catch my siblings (the same ones who laughed at me for enjoying fish keeping) sitting in my rocker gazing into my tanks...

 

[easternreefer]

My wife enjoys the tank and will feed but does no maintanence. She does want certain animals in the tank. Including bristle worms. She says they are creepy and cool. But it's my tank and my relaxer. She has her cats.

 

[Goby-won]

I guess i got really lucky, i get to vote the option:
Full-on reefer. We’re a reef team when it comes to designing and maintaining the reef!

AKA, We don't have any money and we are eating cat food

 

[ShyShy]

My boyfriend had one in the past and I've been an avid reefer since I was a kid. I had been on show tours for a few years out of college so I let go of the more serious reef keeping. I stopped touring when I met him, set up my old nano cube, and HE made a comment about getting a bigger tank. And well...that was a snowball on a Canadian mountain...
I think my dormant obsession took him by surprise.
Anyway, he enjoys the reef a lot. He has PTSD (navy vet) and it's been calming for us. It's more of a spectators sport for him. Puts in an opinion on aquascaping and will buy coral every now and then, but no heavy lifting or maintenance unless it's necessary.

 

[FirstContact]

My wife goes to MACNA shows and meetings with me. She likes the corals and fish and the talks and raffles. She gets that it’s my hobby.

 

[jahnje]

I said let's get a fish bowl. Wife said shouldn't it be a tank. I said might as well be the biggest they have here so the kids can have fun. 6 tanks later. She picks the fish and I pick the hardware. I do maintenance. We both enjoy. The 4 kids check in every once in a while.

 

[Susan Edwards]

My husband falls inbetween 2 choices. He's not full on but more than just go to LFS occassionally. He actually wants to go to the lfs, and helps choosing corals. In fact, I'd probably spend a tad less if he didn't encourage me to "if you want it, get it". Last friday we had to put a dog down and go to sacramento where my dau is a vet. We went to 2 new fish stores and came home with 15 corals. In 2 weeks I'll go back to get a couple new fish (running fallow at moment) and he'll be more than happy to drive me. He doesn't do tank work but goes into my office to check out the corals every morning and evening and on weekends he likes to watch the rbta eat. And he's probably amendable to a tank in livingroom. A larger tank <g>

 

[ezzelld]

My tank (FL girl) hubby feeds the SW 30G fish when I work late. He tries to participate in water changes but I am protective. I asked one day if he would go with me to LFS? Nope. If he said yes then we would do it together. Wish he would!

 

[skrivan]

Lisa will feed the fish, probably would add some vitamins etc if pressed. Mostly she just likes to look at it with me and comment on how cool this or that is. She does not like the occasional mess. I separated the 'aquarium stuff' from the 'kitchen stuff' long ago so that's not a problem anymore. I think she likes the fact that I enjoy doing it. (It's better than a model railroad!). Of course I just hope that when I die she doesn't sell it all for what I said it cost. My 200 gallon DT is kind of a centerpiece in that part of the house, so she wants me to keep it looking good.

 

[dcraigj]

My ex wife was never interested in an aquarium and never wanted one in the the house. So after we divorced the first thing I did was start a reef.

 

[chipmunkofdoom2]

A good way to keep the peace with regard to spending is to set a monthly budget for your aquarium, agree on that amount with your significant other (which means they get input), then don't go over that amount. This does require that your household be on a monthly budget, or for you to at least have a basic understanding of your finances.. but really, everyone would be better off if they did that anyway.

A set monthly aquarium budget will also help you (the reefer). You're more careful with your money because you know you only have so much a month. You don't have to have any guilt or endure any sort of disapproval when you do buy something aquarium-related. You don't have to endure some sort of perverse ***-for-tat battle where your significant other makes an outrageous purchase and then justifies it by saying "but.. but your aquarium spending!" As long as your spending is no more than your budgeted monthly limit, you and your significant other have peace.

 

[jayala12]

My wife loves my tank and wants her own. She is obsessed with my new clowns and rbta. I’m glad she understands me and this weird obsession to spend ridiculous amounts of money on things that people at work call me a dork for looking at. Drug addiction- drugs= reefing [emoji41]

 

[Bebow]

I'm very fortunate, mine loves the tank and never complains about what I spend. She even encourages me to get what I need.

My wife got me a tank for Christmas and I set it up as a fresh water tank and was happy with it and then the itch came and 2 months later got another tank and started a reef. My wife asked the obvious question..... why didn't you set up a reef with the tank I got you? Lol. Gave her some answer that made her shake her head and now I have a reef tank and a freshwater with discus and angels
Told her she was an enabler and she told me I was full of

Just a word of caution. When angelfish mature they are down right mean, especially if they pair up. They don't mix well with discus. I bred discus for a few years and have kept angels over the last 20+ years so just beware.

 

[saltyhog]

My wife is definitely in the encouraging category. She asks questions about the tank, notices if anything new is in the tank and encourages me. The grand kids love it and cleaning little finger prints off of the glass is one of my favorite maintenance tasks!

 

[trevormass7]

There are hobbies that cost more money?!

A lot of people near me build classic cars

 

[trevormass7]

My girlfriend loves to look at my tanks but says it takes up too much of my time and I waste too much money on it. I guess you lose some and win some

 

[Don Lidtke]

The verdict is still out since I am just starting out. (This is my retirement hobby.)The fish quarantine tank is cycling and the coral qt is in the budget.

However when we were looking at houses she supported the idea of a place for a tank and a fish room.

Thanks to My Love the fish room isn’t painted Navy camo...lol!

 

[2Wheelsonly]

My wife never gives me crap about spending money on the tank, there is a fish store across the street from our gym and she usually walks over there with me after our workouts knowing I'm gonna go ham if they have a nice selection.

I'd be miserable if my wife hated my hobbies; that's no way to live life.