For me it is unfortunately none. I try to get her to buy herself those things and she won't. I've bought her relatively expensive purses and she won't even use them. I try to get her to buy herself things to justify the money I spend but she won't. It is about every other weekend that she decides the family needs to take a weekend trip somewhere, so I use that as justification.Look at it this way: how many pairs of shoes, jackets and handbags has your significant other snuck into the house in the past week/month/quarter/year? Exactly.
I don't lie to my wife about any purchases, it'd be pointless anyway since we only have the one bank account and she is the one who balances it. I used to tell her everything I'd buy, she would complain and I'd buy it anyway. Now as long as it's something cheap I don't even tell her anymore. It's actually gotten to where she doesn't even mention it when she sees the charges on the debit card, so the way I see it I'm breaking her down. If it's more than a hundred dollars or so I'll tell her before buying it. The key to my system is to make a bunch of small purchases.